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Calum Ruxton
Angry Bay Area man has a Nikon
Reflections on Becoming 30
Looking back at Covid era photos, I noticed I took a lot of wides isolating the backs of strangers. I know people talk of loneliness as an unspoken side effect of the pandemic response, (despite being more connected than ever though a shared global traumatic experience) though maybe the reason I never noticed it at the time was because I was already in the midst of a years long period of personal loneliness.
I fell out of touch with a lot of people from school and work over the years, but even in those friend groups, I felt like an awkward outsider and never quite connected with friends on a deeper level. This of course led to a lot of fomo and feeling like I’ve made mistakes in the way I act.
But when you’re completely separated physically from everyone you know you stop playing the blame game, and start recognizing that this is no way to live changes have to be made. In order to pull myself out of loneliness I began making more conscious efforts to be with people who were in my life. In time, that effort helped me find stronger connections with friends and be present for important moments in each of our lives, and even bridge friend groups together.Nowadays these connections are kind of the best thing I have going on, and led to some of the greatest experiences of my late twenties.
Reflections on Becoming 30
Looking back at Covid era photos, I noticed I took a lot of wides isolating the backs of strangers. I know people talk of loneliness as an unspoken side effect of the pandemic response, (despite being more connected than ever though a shared global traumatic experience) though maybe the reason I never noticed it at the time was because I was already in the midst of a years long period of personal loneliness.
I fell out of touch with a lot of people from school and work over the years, but even in those friend groups, I felt like an awkward outsider and never quite connected with friends on a deeper level. This of course led to a lot of fomo and feeling like I’ve made mistakes in the way I act.
But when you’re completely separated physically from everyone you know you stop playing the blame game, and start recognizing that this is no way to live changes have to be made. In order to pull myself out of loneliness I began making more conscious efforts to be with people who were in my life. In time, that effort helped me find stronger connections with friends and be present for important moments in each of our lives, and even bridge friend groups together.Nowadays these connections are kind of the best thing I have going on, and led to some of the greatest experiences of my late twenties.
Reflections on Becoming 30
Looking back at Covid era photos, I noticed I took a lot of wides isolating the backs of strangers. I know people talk of loneliness as an unspoken side effect of the pandemic response, (despite being more connected than ever though a shared global traumatic experience) though maybe the reason I never noticed it at the time was because I was already in the midst of a years long period of personal loneliness.
I fell out of touch with a lot of people from school and work over the years, but even in those friend groups, I felt like an awkward outsider and never quite connected with friends on a deeper level. This of course led to a lot of fomo and feeling like I’ve made mistakes in the way I act.
But when you’re completely separated physically from everyone you know you stop playing the blame game, and start recognizing that this is no way to live changes have to be made. In order to pull myself out of loneliness I began making more conscious efforts to be with people who were in my life. In time, that effort helped me find stronger connections with friends and be present for important moments in each of our lives, and even bridge friend groups together.Nowadays these connections are kind of the best thing I have going on, and led to some of the greatest experiences of my late twenties.
Reflections on Becoming 30
Looking back at Covid era photos, I noticed I took a lot of wides isolating the backs of strangers. I know people talk of loneliness as an unspoken side effect of the pandemic response, (despite being more connected than ever though a shared global traumatic experience) though maybe the reason I never noticed it at the time was because I was already in the midst of a years long period of personal loneliness.
I fell out of touch with a lot of people from school and work over the years, but even in those friend groups, I felt like an awkward outsider and never quite connected with friends on a deeper level. This of course led to a lot of fomo and feeling like I’ve made mistakes in the way I act.
But when you’re completely separated physically from everyone you know you stop playing the blame game, and start recognizing that this is no way to live changes have to be made. In order to pull myself out of loneliness I began making more conscious efforts to be with people who were in my life. In time, that effort helped me find stronger connections with friends and be present for important moments in each of our lives, and even bridge friend groups together.Nowadays these connections are kind of the best thing I have going on, and led to some of the greatest experiences of my late twenties.
Reflections on Becoming 30
Looking back at Covid era photos, I noticed I took a lot of wides isolating the backs of strangers. I know people talk of loneliness as an unspoken side effect of the pandemic response, (despite being more connected than ever though a shared global traumatic experience) though maybe the reason I never noticed it at the time was because I was already in the midst of a years long period of personal loneliness.
I fell out of touch with a lot of people from school and work over the years, but even in those friend groups, I felt like an awkward outsider and never quite connected with friends on a deeper level. This of course led to a lot of fomo and feeling like I’ve made mistakes in the way I act.
But when you’re completely separated physically from everyone you know you stop playing the blame game, and start recognizing that this is no way to live changes have to be made. In order to pull myself out of loneliness I began making more conscious efforts to be with people who were in my life. In time, that effort helped me find stronger connections with friends and be present for important moments in each of our lives, and even bridge friend groups together.Nowadays these connections are kind of the best thing I have going on, and led to some of the greatest experiences of my late twenties.
Reflections on Becoming 30
I started shooting film in 2017 as I was finishing college. I look back at photos from this era as some of my favorites.
Nostalgia is a hell of a thing, but seeing my college house through a literal real lens helps make sense of what my reality was: chaotic and messy- just like lots of 20 year old boys. It’s an era that shaped my past decade and while there’s a shit load of things I wish were different, I don’t regret this lifestyle at all.
This was also the time when I was shooting the most. Sometimes I feel disappointed in myself that I don’t shoot with this frequency anymore, but then I remember I was a directionless fresh grad, working as a part time bar back to pay for burgers and weed. I had too much free time.
Even though I don’t shoot as often as I used to, I’m glad I got my act together eventually and for the choices I made during this era to get me here. Totally worth it.
Reflections on Becoming 30
I started shooting film in 2017 as I was finishing college. I look back at photos from this era as some of my favorites.
Nostalgia is a hell of a thing, but seeing my college house through a literal real lens helps make sense of what my reality was: chaotic and messy- just like lots of 20 year old boys. It’s an era that shaped my past decade and while there’s a shit load of things I wish were different, I don’t regret this lifestyle at all.
This was also the time when I was shooting the most. Sometimes I feel disappointed in myself that I don’t shoot with this frequency anymore, but then I remember I was a directionless fresh grad, working as a part time bar back to pay for burgers and weed. I had too much free time.
Even though I don’t shoot as often as I used to, I’m glad I got my act together eventually and for the choices I made during this era to get me here. Totally worth it.
Reflections on Becoming 30
I started shooting film in 2017 as I was finishing college. I look back at photos from this era as some of my favorites.
Nostalgia is a hell of a thing, but seeing my college house through a literal real lens helps make sense of what my reality was: chaotic and messy- just like lots of 20 year old boys. It’s an era that shaped my past decade and while there’s a shit load of things I wish were different, I don’t regret this lifestyle at all.
This was also the time when I was shooting the most. Sometimes I feel disappointed in myself that I don’t shoot with this frequency anymore, but then I remember I was a directionless fresh grad, working as a part time bar back to pay for burgers and weed. I had too much free time.
Even though I don’t shoot as often as I used to, I’m glad I got my act together eventually and for the choices I made during this era to get me here. Totally worth it.
Reflections on Becoming 30
I started shooting film in 2017 as I was finishing college. I look back at photos from this era as some of my favorites.
Nostalgia is a hell of a thing, but seeing my college house through a literal real lens helps make sense of what my reality was: chaotic and messy- just like lots of 20 year old boys. It’s an era that shaped my past decade and while there’s a shit load of things I wish were different, I don’t regret this lifestyle at all.
This was also the time when I was shooting the most. Sometimes I feel disappointed in myself that I don’t shoot with this frequency anymore, but then I remember I was a directionless fresh grad, working as a part time bar back to pay for burgers and weed. I had too much free time.
Even though I don’t shoot as often as I used to, I’m glad I got my act together eventually and for the choices I made during this era to get me here. Totally worth it.
Reflections on Becoming 30
I started shooting film in 2017 as I was finishing college. I look back at photos from this era as some of my favorites.
Nostalgia is a hell of a thing, but seeing my college house through a literal real lens helps make sense of what my reality was: chaotic and messy- just like lots of 20 year old boys. It’s an era that shaped my past decade and while there’s a shit load of things I wish were different, I don’t regret this lifestyle at all.
This was also the time when I was shooting the most. Sometimes I feel disappointed in myself that I don’t shoot with this frequency anymore, but then I remember I was a directionless fresh grad, working as a part time bar back to pay for burgers and weed. I had too much free time.
Even though I don’t shoot as often as I used to, I’m glad I got my act together eventually and for the choices I made during this era to get me here. Totally worth it.
Reflections on Becoming 30
I started shooting film in 2017 as I was finishing college. I look back at photos from this era as some of my favorites.
Nostalgia is a hell of a thing, but seeing my college house through a literal real lens helps make sense of what my reality was: chaotic and messy- just like lots of 20 year old boys. It’s an era that shaped my past decade and while there’s a shit load of things I wish were different, I don’t regret this lifestyle at all.
This was also the time when I was shooting the most. Sometimes I feel disappointed in myself that I don’t shoot with this frequency anymore, but then I remember I was a directionless fresh grad, working as a part time bar back to pay for burgers and weed. I had too much free time.
Even though I don’t shoot as often as I used to, I’m glad I got my act together eventually and for the choices I made during this era to get me here. Totally worth it.
Reflections on Becoming 30
I started shooting film in 2017 as I was finishing college. I look back at photos from this era as some of my favorites.
Nostalgia is a hell of a thing, but seeing my college house through a literal real lens helps make sense of what my reality was: chaotic and messy- just like lots of 20 year old boys. It’s an era that shaped my past decade and while there’s a shit load of things I wish were different, I don’t regret this lifestyle at all.
This was also the time when I was shooting the most. Sometimes I feel disappointed in myself that I don’t shoot with this frequency anymore, but then I remember I was a directionless fresh grad, working as a part time bar back to pay for burgers and weed. I had too much free time.
Even though I don’t shoot as often as I used to, I’m glad I got my act together eventually and for the choices I made during this era to get me here. Totally worth it.
Reflections on Becoming 30
I started shooting film in 2017 as I was finishing college. I look back at photos from this era as some of my favorites.
Nostalgia is a hell of a thing, but seeing my college house through a literal real lens helps make sense of what my reality was: chaotic and messy- just like lots of 20 year old boys. It’s an era that shaped my past decade and while there’s a shit load of things I wish were different, I don’t regret this lifestyle at all.
This was also the time when I was shooting the most. Sometimes I feel disappointed in myself that I don’t shoot with this frequency anymore, but then I remember I was a directionless fresh grad, working as a part time bar back to pay for burgers and weed. I had too much free time.
Even though I don’t shoot as often as I used to, I’m glad I got my act together eventually and for the choices I made during this era to get me here. Totally worth it.
Best time to go to the boardwalk is when the weather sucks #cinestill400d
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